Hey fans (HA HA)
Sorry it's been a few days since I hollered at chu.
Last Friday, I had a feeling that I should not commit to any work this week. I suspected that I would be sick, and then I made it happen. First was the lobster bisque that my little brother "Billiam" brought home from the corner store. He ate 2 bites, said it was nasty, and offered it to me. I liked that he was expanding his young palate so I ate it to show him how delicious even liquor store bisque can be. Turns out I should have listened to young, who rarely refuses food, cuz I got food poisoned.
Did that ever suck. Particularly because I had these social things I wanted to do. My philosophy on sickness usually is to pretend like I'm fine so as to psych out the virus. I tried so valiantly to party, jager shots and all. But I just could not get there. My partytime self (witty, charming, coordinated-*chortle*) was bested by some bad lobster. Anyhoo, my efforts probably didn't much help the recovery process. So I was feeling like shit well into this week.
Not bueno!
So hump day is here. I haven't done skippy all week, and here I am in my local coffee shop sipping on a green tea. I gave up coffee for Lent and I think I misjudged how much I like coffee. I'm kinda irritable and the decor in this place is pissing me off more than usual. The decor, by the way = annoying, shrill bumper stickers plastered chaotically all over the walls. A few zingers:
NOT FOOLED by the Government
Question Authority
CHOOSE REALITY
and one of my favorites:
ART not APATHY
which is funny when you look at the art displayed here, which are like, stoner renderings of Medusa heads.
Don't get me wrong. I'm no Ann Coulter; I lean way to the left (so says the online quiz I took the other day), and am all for questioning authority and all that good shit. But in this particular municipality, the authoritative ideology =s the dogma or what-have-you expressed cumulatively by all these dumb ass bumper stickers. So, why does one then feel the need to trumpet this accepted dogma via bumper stickers plastered on your wall/laptop/binder/Subaru? WHY?
We know you hate Bush. We know. In fact, we can easily predict your exact set of beliefs and opinions based on the fit of your jeans, your hat, your bicycle, your manpurse/satchel, the growth of your beard. That is all fine and good. But you know what? At this point, like 66% of the country disapproves of Bush. Turn your scrutiny on something else. The less obvious targets for criticism are often the most relevant.
Alright, that is DEFINITELY enough of that. I will probably be really embarrassed by this post later and edit out those last paragraphs. OK bye.
TEMPIST
Wednesday, March 7, 2007
Friday, March 2, 2007
Define "Casual"
Hey y'all. Soo, despite my good intentions with respect to this blog, what with uniting migrant workers with temps to form a class-blind mega union and saving democracy and whatnot--I have a feeling that this lofty venture will quickly deteriorate into me complaining about my hangover pretty much every day.
That said, I feel like total shit! Thankfully it's Casual Friday, so it's hopefully all good that I smell like a dumpster and was seen classily eating cup o' noodles at my desk at 8 AM. Whatever--chick in accounting is wearing sweats and what looks to be a Big Dog t-shirt. (Remember Big DOg shirts? Circa Hypercolor.) Casual kewl!!
I, for one, uuuuusually try to make an effort to look civilized at work and brush my hair and stuff, because I've found that people tend to cut you slack when you at least look like you've got your act together. Besides, I was told that I am (temporarily) "the face of this company." It's a brokerage firm, or something like that, which means that the little stock market crash of 2 days ago could very well be my bad, right? You never know--what's it called, the butterfly effect? Where a butterlfly flapping its wings in Timbuktu is the breeze on your face? Very deep shit. Kinda making my head hurt right now, actually.Ow. Ow. Ow.
It kinda spices up life to think that way--to ascribe this awesome power to my pitiful little existence as a temporary corporate chump slash aspiring blogger.
Time for my 15-minute "morning break." WHat the hell is that about? I'd rather just sit here, but it's mandated by law that I go stand outside for 15 min. It's, like, designed for smokers. As a nonsmoker, what do I do, go outside for a gum break? Toothpick chewing break? Poke around in the hat store next door?
Or...just blaze up a doobie real quick...
Holler at u later.
-LA TEMPIST
That said, I feel like total shit! Thankfully it's Casual Friday, so it's hopefully all good that I smell like a dumpster and was seen classily eating cup o' noodles at my desk at 8 AM. Whatever--chick in accounting is wearing sweats and what looks to be a Big Dog t-shirt. (Remember Big DOg shirts? Circa Hypercolor.) Casual kewl!!
I, for one, uuuuusually try to make an effort to look civilized at work and brush my hair and stuff, because I've found that people tend to cut you slack when you at least look like you've got your act together. Besides, I was told that I am (temporarily) "the face of this company." It's a brokerage firm, or something like that, which means that the little stock market crash of 2 days ago could very well be my bad, right? You never know--what's it called, the butterfly effect? Where a butterlfly flapping its wings in Timbuktu is the breeze on your face? Very deep shit. Kinda making my head hurt right now, actually.Ow. Ow. Ow.
It kinda spices up life to think that way--to ascribe this awesome power to my pitiful little existence as a temporary corporate chump slash aspiring blogger.
Time for my 15-minute "morning break." WHat the hell is that about? I'd rather just sit here, but it's mandated by law that I go stand outside for 15 min. It's, like, designed for smokers. As a nonsmoker, what do I do, go outside for a gum break? Toothpick chewing break? Poke around in the hat store next door?
Or...just blaze up a doobie real quick...
Holler at u later.
-LA TEMPIST
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Hi Erica! I mean everyone. And welcome to my blog, Temp2fire.com. Hopefully this will lead to insta fame and riches--and hours of amusement for you, my reader(s).
Basically, my point here is two-fold. First of all, I am bored out of my everloving mind for around 70% of my waking hours. Not to get too Office-Spacey, but my day goes a little something like this: wake up to the sound of my neighbor's buzzsaw; contemplate suicide as I freshen up last night's eyeliner; show up late; space out until 3 p.m.; sort mail; leave. Soo, this provides me with a little something to do. Personal email is blocked at this company because of viruses, so I can't email my friends or go on frickin' MySpace. SO basically, my sources of entertainment are limited to: Craigslist, Perezhilton and all that crap, and the newspaper websites, which make my eyes hurt when I'm hungover, which is often. Point being, I'm bored. And frickin' awful employee.
Secondly, and in all seriousness, us temp workers are arguably the most shat upon segment of the work force, maybe besides like door-to-door canvassers or tax collectors or other more glaringly obvious like migrant workers. But still, we tend to fly under the radar, which is sometimes a plus esp. when, like myself, you don't do shit. But we don't get insurance...we don't get to load up on free drinx at the holiday party...and worst of all, temping is stereotypically associated with a lack of ambition. When, little do they know--I also pen this hot blog and am planning on applying to State! So more importantly, this site is giving voice to a population pushed to the margins. And I also would like to offer tips for youngsters entering the work force on how to get away with things and how to get the most bang for your buck. Oh, if only I knew then that I do now. (I'd be a Rod Stewart song.)
Therefore, my blog will be very useful to myself and to others, if only Erica. Time to do the mail. Peace.
-THE TEMPIST
Basically, my point here is two-fold. First of all, I am bored out of my everloving mind for around 70% of my waking hours. Not to get too Office-Spacey, but my day goes a little something like this: wake up to the sound of my neighbor's buzzsaw; contemplate suicide as I freshen up last night's eyeliner; show up late; space out until 3 p.m.; sort mail; leave. Soo, this provides me with a little something to do. Personal email is blocked at this company because of viruses, so I can't email my friends or go on frickin' MySpace. SO basically, my sources of entertainment are limited to: Craigslist, Perezhilton and all that crap, and the newspaper websites, which make my eyes hurt when I'm hungover, which is often. Point being, I'm bored. And frickin' awful employee.
Secondly, and in all seriousness, us temp workers are arguably the most shat upon segment of the work force, maybe besides like door-to-door canvassers or tax collectors or other more glaringly obvious like migrant workers. But still, we tend to fly under the radar, which is sometimes a plus esp. when, like myself, you don't do shit. But we don't get insurance...we don't get to load up on free drinx at the holiday party...and worst of all, temping is stereotypically associated with a lack of ambition. When, little do they know--I also pen this hot blog and am planning on applying to State! So more importantly, this site is giving voice to a population pushed to the margins. And I also would like to offer tips for youngsters entering the work force on how to get away with things and how to get the most bang for your buck. Oh, if only I knew then that I do now. (I'd be a Rod Stewart song.)
Therefore, my blog will be very useful to myself and to others, if only Erica. Time to do the mail. Peace.
-THE TEMPIST
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